I wasn't expecting to get a new job so soon, but since I have this opportunity, I'm jumping at it. It means something to me, too. I'm going to be working at a crisis call center for all victims of domestic vilence--child, spousal, signifigant other. Considering my history, I do feel a large pull to work with this, to be a voice where maybe I could have used one.

All my papers are done for the semester too, which feels wonderful. I think this calls for a celebration this weekend. Wakashi, Akira, Kouhei, Sen...feel like joining 'Sushi and I for a night out?

Stolen from Yukimura.

( I've come to realize.... )

I got in late last night, from what I think was the most painful train ride I've ever taken. The bullet train wasn't even running out of Aomori; I had to take local trains for the first leg of my trip, and switch trains a couple times. All this has done was confirm that while snow is pretty, that much of it is just craziness.

Even though I didn't quite mean to go away, I think it did some good things, too. It cleared my head, for one thing. I finally feel line I have brains, not a wad of cotton. I also got sleep...yay sleep! Need to work on the eating thing, though.

There was also amazing reunion sex. I think the less said about that, the better. No need to give 'Sushi a reason to kill me so soon.

I think now I'm going to take a week or two, take care of myself, then start looking for more work. And--Wakashi, you're not going to believe this--I don't think I'm going to take summer classes! I'll be able to graduate next spring without them. A summer without classes...maybe a beach trip can be had now.

Oh, and Echizen? I have a large snowball in my freezer...where do you want it delivered?

You know, I never believed that Aomori got more snow than Sapporo, until now. I swear, this storm shows no sign of stopping, and while it's very pretty to watch, it's also disturbing to hear people talk about storms that shut down the trains for a week at a time. At least hostels are cheap, warm, and apparantly now come with wireless internet. Who knew?

And at least I can now email my paper to my professor, because I'm not sure if I'll be back on Monday. Definitely not in time for class.

Note to self: Shinji next time you buy random train tickets in the winter, head SOUTH. South is good. Though I have to say, I prefer the cold and snow to cold and bareness, or cold and rain.

'Sushi, I left you a voice mail, but yeah. Not getting home today.

Aki, coffee at some point sounds good. I'll even throw a snowball for you.

Wakashi...let me know when you come out of hiding. I'm getting worried that you haven't even responded to comments.

I am seriously in love with my praticum. I now know what I want to do with my life. I want to be a profiler. I want to get into the minds of criminals and such and figure them out, and bring them to justice. Yes, I can do the clincal work, and I'm good at it, but I know now that it brings me no joy. It's just...something to do. Forensic and criminal psych...there's my passion.

I'm going to be able to do my internship next fall with where I am now, which is amazing! I'm learning so much just once a week...every day will be fabulous.

And, I've been thinking about something. Even though Terry was a huge bitch about it (which, by the way? Bite me. You're not nearly as superior as you like to seem.), she may have a point. I'm stressed, and even though I like helping people, I hate what I'm doing there. I hate that my hours are getting so screwed up, and I hate that I have to work over the maximum (which, again, certain people are talking out of their asses and don't have a clue). So I need to cut back. And cutting back I am.

I. Quit.

That's right. Quitting the counsling center as of...right now, actually. I'm calling Mie-sensei next, but I figured I'd make certain people so much happier my announcing it now. So, screw the counsling center.

Now, to make that phone call, finish my lunch, and enjoy my practicum.

Well, at least there was a Valentine's respite. I actually got to spend the evening with 'Sushi, though I have to shamefully admit that I kind of forgot about the actual day until I got home and 'Sushi was greeting me at the door with flowers. He gave me a ring, too, which is beautiful, and I love wearing it, though I felt even worse about forgetting. I'll make it up for him on White Day.

And now my schedule is back to crazy plus a side of insanity, thanks to midterms and midterm papers, too. I'm not sure when I'll see the apartment again. Aki, you may have a Shinji-zombie at your dorm some evening, just so I can catch a nap on your couch between class and work. I'm campus-hopping this week, plus my normal Higashi overload.

I'm hoping something gives after midterms are over. I'm not really sure how much more I can take. And I feel so weak for saying that, too. I can do this. I can.

I figure since I've all but moved in here, I can at least make this place feel a little more cheery. So I printed this out and put it up in the waiting area:


more animals

Because who can resist an lolcat, really?

And since it's quiet now, I'll catch up on a few case files, then do some homework. 'Sushi, I'll be home late Saturday morning for awhile. I miss you.


(ooc: I couldn't resist when I saw it! And now back to my hiatus, and all the headaches with it.)

Funny. When I went home from work Thursday, there were three of us who mainly worked Higashi's campus. I went in today, and we're down to just one. Me. Talked to Mie-sensei, and she's going to try to shuffle people around some but until then, if I am not in class or at my practicum, I will most likely be at work, weekends included. I'm trying to talk her into setting up some sort of crisis line, since I can't live in the counsling center. This is going to be the state of affairs for the next two weeks at least, though.

The problem is that all the campuses are understaffed, and even with a large influx of trainees, it takes time, and they can't handle anything by themselves. Even once it gets straightened out, I'm looking at a constant string of overnight shifts for...well, a long time.

I trust Mie-sensei to work this out. I just wish it hadn't happened this semester.

'Sushi's going to kill me....

The weekend went by too fast, and another week at work, and school, starts. Including two midnight shifts this week. I must be insane. I'm also forgetting what sleep is like more and more, and this is becoming normal to me.

I have to say, I'm already looking forward to the end of the semester. Then I will be able to do the little things, like sleep, and eat, and do more than grab five mnutes at a time with my fiancee. Actually, I just wish midterms were over. It's weird this semester, but the worst of my papers and such hit at midterms rather than the end of the semester, so maybe if I can just get past that, it won't be as bad anymore. Bad, yes, but I may be able to get more than 3 or 4 hours of sleep a night. Maybe a whole FIVE hours!

I want to be there and have time for 'Sushi. I want to be there and have time for my friends. I want to do my absolute best in school and at work and in my practicum.

I think I'm failing at all of the above.

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Thanks, Sen!